This year I turn 30. We humans count our laps around the sun, and, by tradition, celebrate these milestones, and the number of laps we take symbolize phases in our life.
Normally when finishing one of these laps, we reflect on the last lap, and what can be done differently in the next. This reflection intensifies even more when the number of laps completed is exact. One more decade!!!
Inspired by an article from an author I really enjoy, I decided to do an interview, a back-and-forth between Fellipe at 30 and the Fellipe who had just turned 20.
20: Did it pass really fast? 30: I didn’t believe and I didn’t really like it when people said life passed quickly, but you know, it seems it was last year that I was your age. I made the most of it, I lived a lot, and I have many stories to tell from these last 10 years, but it all went very fast, and one of my personal challenges has been to enjoy each little detail of every day a little more.
20: People who are 30 are old, kind of pot-bellied, married, with kids, and stable in some house. Are you already like that? Did you manage to buy that orange house you wanted here in Paranaguá? 30: So… first, those of us at 30 are not old. I’m not pot-bellied — quite the opposite — and my only child so far has 4 paws and a lot of fur. I haven’t gotten my orange house yet, but I managed to live by the beach again! It’s not exactly Ipanema, but it’ll do :)
20: Did you record any CD with your band? Do you still play shows together? 30: Man, I haven’t been in a studio for some good years. I went years without playing, only recently I bought a keyboard. I haven’t seen my band friends in many years. I miss them, and it was a great time. If I were you, I’d enjoy every minute of the next year — after 21 you won’t play more than 10 times together. Being an adult is a drag!
20: You’re a pastor, right? By my count, at your age, you’ve already saved half of Brazil, right? 30: No, man, I’m not what we conventionally call a pastor. Deep down I feel joy and relief at not having become the monster I was being trained to be, on the other hand I always feel this responsibility to be “salt and light” wherever I go. And stop with this story of saving all of Brazil. One thing we need to learn at 20 is that before changing the world we need to clean our own room and be charitable to our neighbor.
20: Do you play soccer every week? 30: It’s been two years since I played a soccer match. Actually, I played one 3 months ago, but the embarrassment was so great that I’d rather forget, lol.
20: Anything you didn’t do and think you should have done? 30: I don’t really like keeping a list of “things I should have done” for too long. Normally what I want to do, I do. Of course there are financial limitations, and these I am obliged to respect. Other than that, I did a lot of cool things. I traveled, had a lot of sex (something you at 20 don’t even know what it is), smiled a lot, enjoyed the friends life gifted me, really enjoyed the birthdays and holidays with my parents and my wife, learned to surf, play tennis, rode a roller coaster, ferris wheel… There is nothing I left behind. I was happy in these last 10 years.
20: Are we very different? 30: I think yes and no. We are completely different and yet totally the same. I look in the mirror and still see you, sometimes I am more you than I “should” be, but you will only be able to be like me 10 years from now, when you lose friends, see people your age die, are betrayed and forgotten. You will only know what I know when you discover how nice it is to make your wife happy, give a gift to your mom, and discover what it is to go more than a year without seeing your dad. I know it’s old-man talk, but maturity only comes with experience, and although our essence is still the same, and that’s why we are equal, experience prevents me from thinking like you, and that’s why we are completely different.
20: Has your spiritual experience over the last 20 years been like that of the “heroes” I have today at 20? 30: God, to me today, is much more real than when I was your age, and much more indecipherable. It’s impressive that the more I know and experience of this spiritual universe, the more aware I become of my ignorance. No, I am not similar to anything you have known up to your 20s. That miracle-worker pastor, the conqueror of multitudes, the lead singer of the gospel band… those guys you so admire, no… I am completely different, and I have new heroes.
A place I want to visit 20: Bogotá 30: Tahiti A wish 20: Travel the world with my band 30: Sit at my parents’ house’s table again A soccer team 20: Flamengo 30: Soccer, what? A sport: 20: Soccer/Soccer 30: Surfing/Tennis A purchase desire: 20: A Peugeot 205 30: A beach house with space for visitors A woman: 20: Joana 30: Joana A pet: 20: What is that? 30: Lucky!!! A favorite food: 20: Barbecue 30: Grilled salmon A book: 20: Dream and you will win the world 30: Why I don’t want to go to church anymore A band: 20: Seres Vivientes 30: U2 A Hobby: 20: Playing Piano 30: Playing Piano A word 20: Metanoia 30: Carpe Diem A goal 20: Save the world 30: Manage to save myself and my neighbor